Until we look at our own faults, we will not stop looking at the faults of others.
- Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati
I have a friend, an executive coach, who helps executives become more humble. Successful people and leaders tend to be too proud, because they have achieved a lot. He charges an extra $20 if you say "but, no or however". He is training top CEOs of huge companies to take feedback without saying, "I agree. I disagree.", without being defensive. You have to just listen, make notes, and say thank you.
Srila Prabhupada is teaching us to be like a bee, not like a fly. Flies go to sores and the bees go for honey. Apart from having some bad qualities, people have good qualities, and we should be able to appreciate and recognize those good qualities, and not focus on something that is wrong in other people.
How can you not see faults?
Especially people that are materially intelligent, they are very perceptive. So they can see many things. When materially intelligent people come to our movement, the immediately see, "This is bad in the management, This preacher is proud, or he is self-righteous. Etc." So how can you not see faults? You are not blind.
Some years ago, when I saw defects in leadership, one day I realized that I have a choice - I can criticize or I can try to help.
What would be a humble way to react to a situation when you are accused of something that you have not done?
You may think that Krsna is behind it and you are being accused for a reason. And you can't control it. It may have been something you have done in the past that is causing this. There is lesson there.
If I remain quiet when I am accuse of something I have not done, then people will continue to accuse me, and continue to get on my case, and torture me. What to do?
You may explained what happened. If they continue to accuse you, then just accept it.
When we see a real humility in action, it touches our heart.
What I have seen in my life and in lives of people I know is that even if you don't want to look at your faults, you always get feedback about them. People somehow tell you. Sometimes even a child can come and tell you something. Through some channel you get what you need to hear and what you need to change. So we cannot avoid hearing what we need to change.
One way that we can work on improving ourselves by being proactive, taking initiative, to change, is that we ask for feedforward. Instead of what you have done wrong in the past, you can ask people what can you do better in the future. More or less it is the same as feedback, but it is easier for the false ego.
You ask for one or two suggestions on how to improve in one area. That you try your best to apply it and let them know.
